TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (334)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of The Telegraph (from Tuesday, August 23; link good at time of posting):

By his own admission, the Mastermind appearance was not Simon Curtis’s finest hour.

He notched up the BBC quiz show’s worst specialist subject score when he gave only one correct answer out of a possible 25 on the films of the actor Jim Carrey.

But yesterday Mr Curtis was dealt another blow to his pride when Ofcom, the broadcasting watchdog, ruled that his performance merited the description “astoundingly thick”. Mr Curtis had complained to Ofcom about a Channel 4 programme, Awfully Good TV, which featured clips of excruciating failures on quiz shows. David Walliams, the comedian, provided a commentary.

Introducing the clip of Mr Curtis’s appearance on Mastermind in 2006, Walliams said: “Sometimes in life, you have to know your limitations. If you’re not, let’s say, very bright, it’s probably not a good idea to go on a quiz show that tests your mental agility. And by 'not very bright’ I mean astoundingly thick.”

....

Last night Mr Curtis expressed his disappointment at the ruling.

He said: "Channel 4 and David Walliams have never met me and don't know anything about me, yet they called me astoundingly thick on national television. To me, that denotes general intelligence. How can you say that on the basis of one bad quiz show performance?

"I've never minded sending myself up but it never goes away - I'm still remembered as the bloke who only won one point on his specialist subject."

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TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (333)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of Reuters (from Wednesday, August 17; link good at time of posting):

Republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann offered a "happy birthday" message to the late singer Elvis Presley on Monday, even though August 16 is the anniversary of his death in 1977.

"Happy Birthday, Elvis!" Bachmann shouted from the stage at a campaign stop....

After her stump speech, the congresswoman from Minnesota told a group of reporters that she was happy to be in South Carolina "on the anniversary of Elvis Presley's death."

"He's still alive. He's alive in our hearts," Bachmann said.

Later, a campaign organizer who did not want to be identified said with a wink: "You celebrate Elvis because he never died."

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TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (332)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of the Associated Press (from Tuesday, August 9; link good at time of posting):

A suburban Phoenix man is recovering after police say he accidentally shot himself in the penis while putting his girlfriend's gun in the waistband of his pants.

Chandler police say 27-year-old Joshua Seto and his fiancee, Cara Christopher, were walking toward a grocery store when the shooting happened last week. The gun fired, striking Seto's penis and continuing through his left thigh.

....

In the wake of the shooting, [Chandler Police Detective Seth] Tyler warned residents to use holsters, not waistbands, if they're going to carry a handgun.

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TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (331)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of NBCPhiladelphia.com (from Monday, August 1; link good at time of posting):

Mayor Bob Ryan of Sheboygan, a town of about 51,000 people 50 miles north of Milwaukee, apologized for a wild, boozy weekend in which he passed out in a local tavern. But he said his alcoholism doesn't affect his job performance and said he would not resign, despite a unanimous vote by a city council committee, according to Reuters.

"Did I pass out on a bar? Yes I did. I'll admit that. Was I in a scuffle? Yes. Did I start it? No, I did not," he told a local radio station, WHBL.

....

Although he's a self-confessed alcoholic, Ryan said he's still a good mayor.

"Alcohol has affected my personal life greatly," Ryan said. "I have never walked into a city meeting or council meeting under the influence of alcohol."

Ryan said he would continue to get treatment, but this isn't the first scandal he's been hit with. A YouTube video showed Ryan making sexual comments about a relative in a phone call and faces sexual harassment accusations from a female employee he fired, according to WTMJ.

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Gone Fishing

A Round Tuit will return next week. Probably.

Image: "Gone Fishing" (Norman Rockwell; 1930)