It's all fun and games until you're traded for construction equipment to be named later.

Peanut butter and chocolate.

Tracy and Hepburn.

Sarcasm and employee reviews.

Ah yes, classic combinations can be found all around us. Not the least of these are the great American pastime and the other great American pastime. I speak of course about the game of baseball and the art of contract drafting, respectively.

Imagine my excitement then when I came across Ethan Trex' roundup of fourteen offbeat baseball contract clauses at the Mental Floss blog. Sure, I liked Rollie Fingers' mustache bonus and Charlie Kerfeld's contractually-required thirty-seven boxes of orange Jell-O, but my favorite offbeat clause was undoubtedly Roy Oswalt's:

Before Oswalt made a start in the 2005 National League Championship Series, Astros owner Drayton McLane promised to make the ace’s dreams come true if he won, specifically his life goal of bulldozer ownership. After Oswalt dominated the Cardinals to send Houston to its first-ever World Series, McLane came through with a Caterpillar D6N XL. Since Major League Baseball requires high-dollar gifts be disclosed, Oswalt signed an addendum to his contract, a “bulldozer clause,” authorizing the club to give him his new toy.

Dammit, I'm asking for that in my next job.