A Cyclelogical Approach to Blawg Review

Brett Trout hosts Blawg Review #106 at his Blawg-IT blog.

One of the strengths of the Blawg Review model is that the host has a (more-or-less) free hand to put his own stamp on the roundup. Trout takes full advantage, giving us insight into not only the best of the past week's legal blogging, but also the somewhat arcane world of motorcycle racing. All in all, it makes me wistful for the BMW cycle I had and the Ducati I'll never have, but I digress. The highlights of this week's issue are arranged in a tour of the straightaways and hairpin turns at the Donington Park track in England; these highlights include brain dysfunction as a sentencing consideration, the rise and fall of the dictation tape, and the top ten reasons attorneys should take up knitting.

Professor Bainbridge will host next week, most likely at a more sedate pace.

TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (112)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of The Register (from Thursday, April 26; link good at time of posting):

A Japanese actress inadvertantly [sic] blew the lid off a scam which had duped thousands of women into buying coiffured sheep in the belief they were poodles, the Evening Standard reports.

Maiko Kawakami appeared on a TV talk show with snaps of her pet, and admitted she wondered why it "didn't bark and refused to eat dog food". She was soon set straight - her dog was in fact a sheep.

The revelation provoked a stream of women to contact the cops with "similar problems". The powers that be reckon that as many as 2,000 have fallen victim to the audacious ovine poodle con, perpetrated by internet company "Poodles as Pets", which offered the animals at £630 a pop.

. . . .

In case you're wondering how on God's Green Earth you could mistake a sheep for a dog, the Standard explains that poodles are "extremely rare in Japan, with many people having little idea what they look like".

[Previous TGIS]

Out of Office

UPDATE: Mariners win, 4-2. A great day all around.

Commemorating Anzac Day

Today is Anzac Day in Australia. This day commemorates the sacrifices made by thousands of Australians and New Zealanders at Gallipoli during World War I. We owe our mates down under an incalculable debt of thanks for their support of the Anglo-American alliance in the century since Gallipoli; they remain to this day our most stalwart ally. Jules Crittenden has an excellent roundup of contemporary accounts of the Gallipoli campaign for those of us who are not as familiar as we ought to be with that heroic but ill-fated endeavor.

Blawg Review #35 Update

The Vatican has, after much investigation, decided that there is no limbo. In Slate's "Explainer" column, Michelle Tsai writes:

Until the recent announcement, the limbo crowd was thought to include anyone who hadn't been baptized but would otherwise deserve to go to heaven—like infants (including aborted fetuses), virtuous pagans, and pre-Christian Jews.

. . . .

Dante depicted limbo in his Divine Comedy as a pastoral setting of forests with green meadows, flowing streams, and tall castles. Biblical figures like Noah and Moses live in Dante's limbo, as do Ovid, Homer, Aristotle, a parade of characters from Greco-Roman mythology, and even some Muslims, like Saladin, who managed to fight the crusaders and gain their respect at the same time.

Though the Vatican has effectively done an about-face, it won't directly state that limbo never existed. Instead, it says that official church dogma never included the concept and that limbo remains a "possible theological hypothesis." Why the hemming and hawing? The church can't admit to going against hundreds of years of theological interpretation. Such a reversal would be a sign of error. And since the Roman Catholic Church is imbued with the Holy Spirit, it can never be wrong.

While I always hang on the Pope's every word, this new edict has a particular meaning for me, as Dante's depiction of limbo figured heavily into my Blawg Review #35. Perhaps some further reflection might be necessary on my part.

According to Tsai, the end of limbo doesn't necessarily resolve the status of those previously sent there:

If limbo never existed in the first place, you might assume that these souls passed straight through St. Peter's gates. But the carefully worded document from the Vatican's International Theological Commission stops short of certainty in this regard, arguing only that there are "serious theological and liturgical grounds for hope," rather than "sure knowledge."

Well, unlike some, I've never claimed to be infallible on matters of faith; I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt to those previously in limbo -- everybody goes to Heaven!

Thus, congratulations are in order for Virgil, Dante's guide through Inferno and Purgatorio, as well as the others in #35's limbo: Ross Runkel, Sheryl Schelin, Bruce MacEwen, the Appellate Law and Practice blog, Jim Calloway, Connie Crosby, Andrew Raff, Neil Squillante, the Blawg Review Editor, Kevin O'Keefe, and Evan Schaeffer. Welcome to Paradiso, everyone!

Classified Information

Connie Crosby, noted law librarian and info diva, hosts Blawg Review #105 this week. Although she concedes that she's not a cataloguer, she does an admirable job of categorizing the best of the past week's legal blogging using the Library of Congress classification scheme. It certainly beats my information classification scheme, which comprises the following categories: 1) in a pile and forgotten, 2) in the wastebasket and forgotten, and 3) currently in front of my nose.

Highlights of this week's issue include a good example of unprofessional irresponsibility, controlled vocabulary versus tagging, and librarian gadgetry. Brett Trout of the Blawg IT blog has hosting honors next week. I can't tell you more than that at this point; until next Monday, Blawg Review is classified.

TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (111)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of the Associated Press (from Tuesday, April 17; link good at time of posting):

A Seattle man has been charged with a slew of crimes that involved an alleged shoplifting, assaults and a pet duck named Mr. Peepers.

Snohomish County Deputy Prosecutor Paul Stern on Thursday charged Kenneth Blaine Quinlan, 35, with two counts of third-degree assault and one count each of vehicular assault and hit-and-run.

Authorities say that on March 23, Quinlan and his 39-year-old girlfriend drove to a Lynnwood shopping center, where he entered a Linens 'n Things outlet and she went into a Petco store, taking the duck with her.

Stern wrote in court papers that a security guard thought he saw Quinlan shoplift an iPod speaker system, and a scuffle ensued.

Police say the guard chased Quinlan to the Petco store, where Quinlan got the car keys from his girlfriend and tried to escape.

The man jumped into the driver's seat of the car as the woman walked out of the store with her duck. Not knowing what was going on, she tried to stop him from driving away and was knocked down by the open car door as it backed up. She dropped the duck.

A Petco employee saw what was happening and "ran to save Peepers from the front of the car" just as Quinlan drove forward, Stern wrote. The car ran over the woman, inflicting serious injuries including broken bones in her foot and ankle, he said.

Charging papers say Quinlan continued driving and didn't stop until his vehicle struck another car nearby.

The girlfriend and guard were not seriously hurt. Mr. Peepers was OK.

[Previous TGIS]

Musical Interlude

I'm not a big fan of blog widgets generally, and especially not on this blog particularly, but the online music service Finetune has me intrigued. Thanks to Lileks, I wandered over and built a playlist of fifty old and current favorite songs. That playlist is now available over in the sidebar as a soundtrack of sorts for Infamy or Praise.

It doesn't contain all of my favorites -- The Smiths, Nirvana, Cowboy Junkies, and The Crystal Method are notable absences, amongst many others -- but it does give a good sense of what I like. It's heavy on Euros (or others known primarily in Europe) of various styles and eras. You know how you know I'm gay? I like Coldplay. Domestically, there's a solid nod to the two best Seattle bands of all time, Soundgarden and Screaming Trees; the Bay Area is represented as well by Chris Isaak and Green Day. Of course, the tracks could change at any time, so by the time you listen, it might be all Perry Como tunes or something. Enjoy!

Not Everyone Wants to Get Stoned

At an upcoming Rolling Stones concert in Belgrade, there might just be a few creatures more drugged-up than Keith Richards:

A plan to sedate more than 300 horses stabled at Belgrade's racecourse to keep them calm during a Rolling Stones concert there has enraged Serb animal lovers who are lobbying to have the gig moved to another venue.

The concert is expected to draw more than 100,000 people to the Hippodrome, Belgrade's largest fenced space. The horses will be only a few metres from the stage.

"Horses differ, the same as people. Some are more nervous, more skittish," said hostler Jovanka Prelic. "If they get too nervous or start to panic during the concert, they'll get sedatives."

Serbia's biggest animal protection society, ORCA, says holding the concert there would be extremely harmful to the horses, and sedating them is not the answer.

The animal protection group "said that if it failed to convince the organizers to change the concert venue, it would contact the Rolling Stones directly and ask them to use their influence." I'm going to venture that their plea will likely fall on deaf ears, as 114 years playing in a rock band will do that to you. Even if the message gets through to them, the Stones might just ask for some of what the horses are getting.

Gainfully Employed

Sheryl Schelin of The South Carolina Employment Law Blog has hosted Blawg Review previously in her prior incarnation as The Airport Lawyer; this time around, she leaves the hosting duties to her dog, Rosemary. Notwithstanding, Blawg Review #104 is no dog. Highlights include sour grapes over judicial pay and bad apples in the workplace, limericks about depositions and the ethics of Playboy, and using The Office as a teaching tool and learning from Finding Nemo. Good dog.

TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (110)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of People magazine (from Friday, April 13; link good at time of posting):

Joe Francis is having a bad week.

Jailed in Florida for criminal contempt on Tuesday and indicted in Reno for tax evasion on Wednesday, the Girls Gone Wild creator has now been charged with bribing a jail guard for a bottle of water and possessing prescription sleeping pills in his cell, the AP reports.

According to court records in Florida, Francis offered the guard $100 for a bottle of water on Wednesday evening. When guard turned him down, Francis showed him $500, investigators said. Jail inmates are not allowed to have cash.

Supervisors then searched Francis's cell and discovered 16 prescription medications, including Lunesta – a sleeping pill – and the anti-anxiety medication lorazepam, court records show.

. . . .

The new charges include bribing a public servant, three counts of possessing a controlled substance and five counts of introducing contraband into a detention facility.

The AP reports that Francis could face up to five years in prison for the alleged crimes, which are third-degree felonies.

On Thursday, Scott Barbour, the president of Mantra Films Inc., which produces the Girls Gone Wild videos, was arrested for supplying Francis with the pills and cash, Bay County Sheriff's Office spokeswoman Ruth Sasser told the AP. He was charged with introduction of contraband into a detention facility and is expected to appear in court on Friday.

[Previous TGIS]

TGIS: Thank God It's Schadenfreude! (109)

This week's joy in the misfortune of others comes courtesy of Reuters (from Thursday, April 5; link good at time of posting):

Three Japanese naval officers who swapped pornography on their computers triggered a scandal over a possible leak of sensitive data linked to Japan's missile defense system, a newspaper said Thursday.

Police launched a probe last week after a navy officer married to a Chinese woman was found to have taken home a computer disk containing information about the high-tech Aegis radar system, domestic media said.

. . . .

The officer told police he accidentally copied the confidential data onto his computer's hard disk when copying porn from a computer belonging to a crew member from another destroyer, the Yomiuri newspaper reported.

A third officer was also found to have copied data on the Aegis system alongside pornographic images, the Yomiuri said.

Police suspect senior officers were also involved in the swap because none of the three were authorized to access the confidential information, the Yomiuri said.

[Previous TGIS]

Feeling Lost? Take the Quiz!

Via Begging to Differ: Beliefnet offers a handy quiz -- "Which 'Lost' Character Are You?" My results? I'm Hurley:

Like funny, personable Hurley, you’re a seeker. Maybe you grew up religious, or maybe you didn’t, but you haven’t committed to any one set of beliefs. You tend to find that sometimes making it to the end of the day is a journey in itself. For now, you satisfy your spiritual needs by getting advice and guidance from the people you trust, whether that means asking Sawyer for advice about girls or getting Libby to help you lose weight.

Frankly, I'm quite relieved. When I started the quiz, I was concerned that I'd end up as Aaron:

Like wrinkly, foul-smelling Aaron, you're a baby. You grew up thinking that your father is a feckless, drug-addicted ex-rocker, but you will soon discover that your real father wasn't even that cool. Your existence can best be characterized by noting that you've been nicknamed "Turniphead" by someone who used to be a hobbit, yet you still get 437% more screen time than Rose and Bernard combined. You were rescued from the Others but wish that you'd not been. Your idea of spiritual fulfillment is some quality time with a Dharma Initiative diaper.

Fortunately though, neither he nor Paolo or Nikki are options, so you're safe in taking the quiz; no psychological trauma will result.

A Subconscious is a Terrible Thing to Waste

In my mail today was the final print edition of InfoWorld magazine. The publication is moving from print format to become a web-only publication. It's a worthwhile read and I'll happily follow it online.

The final page of this week's issue is, as usual, devoted to the "Off the Record" column; the column itself is nothing out-of-the-ordinary, but its headline has me wondering whether all of the folks at InfoWorld are wholeheartedly behind the move online:

"Shortcut to Career Suicide"

Blawg Review Gets Shipshape

Today's Blawg Review #102 at the Declarations and Exclusions blog is more serious than the typical Blawg Review not because the law has become any less ridiculous in the past seven days but because host George M. Wallace got the foolishness out of his system in yesterday's preview at his more whimsical A Fool in the Forest blog. Highlights this week include samaratinism (whether good or bad is your call), care and feeding of curmudgeonly legal secretaries, and why it's better to be an attractive defendant. Next week, Jonathan Frieden will host at his E-Commerce Law blog. No fooling.

It's Opening Day and We Haven't a Care in the World

On the morning of opening day each year, the Seattle Mariners are in first place; by the evening of opening day most years, we're not, and that small disappointment usually sets the tone for the remainder of our season. Regardless, for Mariners fans, today is customarily the start of an interlude before our optimism is finally exhausted. For some, that interlude lasts a few months; for others it's a few weeks. For Seattle Post-Intelligencer columnist Art Thiel, it may just be the next three days:

The entire Mariners season will be decided in the opening series against the Oakland A's.

No need to wait until Memorial Day, July 4, the trading deadline, Labor Day or any other traditional seasonal milestones for measuring progress.

All are irrelevant in 2007.

Three games. Three days. Four possible outcomes.

If the Mariners sweep the A's -- Mariners go to the World Series.

If the Mariners win the series 2-1 -- A contending team with a real shot at the division title.

If the Mariners lose the series 1-2 -- Gather into the basement the elderly, the children and bring some bannock and hardtack.

If the A's sweep the Mariners -- The cataclysm, as predicted in the movie "Ghostbusters":

"Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies. Rivers and seas boiling. Forty years of darkness. Earthquakes, volcanoes, the dead rising from the grave. Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together -- mass hysteria."

Hopefully, when Thursday morning rolls around, the skies will be clear, the seas will be calm, the day will be bright, the ground will be stable (as will the dead), my dog will still be a bachelor, and the only hysterical person will be one P-I columnist. If not, perhaps a couple dozen ballplayers in the Emerald City will be the first human sacrifices.

The first game of the season starts in a few moments. Play ball!

UPDATE: Game one of the 2007 season is in the books and it's a very satisfying Mariners victory. Now we can all relax, secure in the knowledge that the worst that can happen to us this week is that you'll have to spend some quality time in the basement with your elderly and children. For those of us without basements, nearby elderly, or more than one child, the prospects for the week are, of course, somewhat brighter.

What a Difference 25 Years Makes

When I posted last week about today's anniversary of the Argentine invasion of the Falklands Islands, the bitter contrast of Britain's decisive response to that challenge with its weakling's response to the current crisis with Iran was not lost on me. Nor is it lost on Tim Montgomerie of BritainandAmerica.com, as he ticks off many reasons for Britain's decline:

Tehran has watched Britain and America consistently fail to respond to its militancy. Its subversive agents have - until recently - been unchallenged in Iraq. It bore no cost for its material support of Hezbollah during last summer's Lebanon conflict. There appears to be no limit to the EU nations' commitment to a diplomatic solution to Iran's nuclear ambitions. While the talk goes on and on Iran could be less than a year away from realising its dream of becoming a nuclear power.

. . . .

The 7/7 bombings showed that within the home-grown population there were people who hated Britain so much that they were willing to kill themselves and their fellow countrymen in suicide bomb attacks. Although the situation is beginning to improve from the darkest days of 'Londonistan', the British authorities have for many years tended to encourage extremism by only dealing with the more extremist 'representatives' of Britain's Muslims. As Michael Gove MP has written, this effective cold-shouldering of moderate voices is a repeat of the way Tony Blair promoted Sinn Fein's status at the expense of the SDLP during the Northern Ireland peace process.

. . . .

There are very few thinkers in Britain who are preparing for future threats. There is, for example, no appreciation of the likelihood of nuclear proliferation and the need for missile defence as our only likely protection.

In other news, Argentina today renewed its claim to the Falkland Islands. Considering today's Britain, why the hell wouldn't they?